Sunday, August 20, 2006

Bitching Again, But Happy

What I'm going to complain about tonight, some of you might be able to relate to but others won't. I'm bitching about a book I had started reading before I got pregnant to just get some ideas. The book is The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy. Any of you who have read this book and loved it, I apologize for what I'm about to say. Those of you who have the same feelings about this book as I do, I send a nod and a wink to you expressing agreement and understanding. I had began reading the book thinking it would be nice to read something light hearted and "real". I enjoyed it in the beginning until I got to the section that talked about miscarriages. This was a very LONG section and it went on and on and on about miscarrying. Usually, when I get to that section (or any section of the books I'm reading that is negative about pregnancy) I simply skip ahead. It took forever to get past it. Since it focused so much on negative crap, I stopped reading it for a while. Well, a couple nights ago I decided to go back and give it another shot. I ended up reading a section that made my head spin and my blood boil. This book said: Don't Exercise. That's right! Don't exercise. Here are the reasons this highly intelligent book gave:

1. You will be too tired.
(Really? I feel so much better when I get to the gym and work out for 45 minutes to an hour. It's actually helped me eliminate any fatigue I might have had. I haven't had much of any and I attribute that to getting plenty of exercise)

2. You will not look good in your leotard.
(I think I look pretty fun in my workout gear. I wear low riding light-weight sweatpants and a long tank top. Not only that, when I'm bent over doing my tricep kick-backs, I know there are some eyes on the new cleavage. Who doesn't love that?)

3. You will get fat anyway.
(What the hell is this woman's problem?!! No shit I'm going to get bigger, but let's not give all the women out there who are having a baby get a nasty complex from reading her crap!)

4. Exercise will not help you in labor or delivery in any way.
(Is she supposed to be some expert? Obviously no. My sister-in-law stayed in awesome shape throughout her pregnancy and I can bet that it helped her out quite a bit in the endurance department when delivering her son and all that she had to go through in that whole experience.)

5. You might endanger the pregnancy
(If you don't know your body or don't pay attention to what you're doing. I stopped preparing for a fitness competition because I'm not a moron. I know sweating profusely, having an extremely high heart rate, and feeling light headed aren't good when you're not pregnant, so, ummm, they probably aren't good for the baby.)

6. Even if you don't endanger the pregnancy, if something, God forbid, goes wrong, you will forever wonder if your exercising caused it.
(Isn't she just a lovely positive woman?)

7. It's Nine months up and Nine months down in the weight-gaining department, no matter what you do. Give or take a few months on the down side.
(Why knock the wind out of our sails? I like to focus on positive outcomes, including the fun of getting back to my old self.)

8. Our compulsion to exercise when we are pregnant is a reflection of our inability to surrender and let nature run its course.
(I had no idea this woman was a psychologist. That's right, she's not. She's an ex Playboy centerfold - not that there's anything wrong with that.)

This is the biggest pile of bullshit I think I've read in a long time (not counting the crap I've read about our government in the last 6 years in the news). How does it make sense to tell women to not take care of their bodies? It is also mentioned in the book to take advantage of this time because it's the best excuse to eat whatever whenever I want. I am after all eating for two! Whhhhaaattt? 300 calories more a day. That's it. Do you want to know what that equals? About 1/2 a cup of yogurt and a banana or apple. That is not an extra cheese burger, a tub of ice cream, a bag of potato chips. It's pretty easy to get to those 300 calories quite quickly.

I have no intention of ever finishing this book or even picking it up ever again. It is not a nice piece of literature nor does it help me get excited about being pregnant and having my daughter. It's not nice, and quite frankly makes this woman sound like a total ass. Skipping through and skimming through that section was enough to turn me off of this book. They promote it as being an uplifting and funny book about pregnancy. It isn't. I will be leaving it in my bathroom for anyone to use whenever we might run out of toilet paper. Feel free to grab a couple sheets from the book after having a big bowl of hearty chili, several cherries for desert and prune juice as a beverage. Enjoy!

By the way, in case you didn't already pick up on it...I don't recommend this book.

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