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Friday, August 05, 2016

Just A Lil' Story

Today, I was driving home with Farrah and there was a little Mazda Miata riding my ass.  I was busy talking to her while keeping an eye on the guy behind me, trying to be sure that I kept things safe on my end the best I could.  While taking the turn off the bridge, he was still on my tail until he went up the hill next to me, driving fast and wild while waiving a fist and middle finger at me.  (Don't forget...Mazda Miata, pshhh).

Having it be the end of a long day and an even longer week, I couldn't help what I said..."Fucking ass!  I hope he crashes."

I looked back at Farrah and said, "Oh wow, honey.  I can't believe I just said that.  Oh my god.  What if he crashed because I just said that?  Do you realize how powerful that would make me?"

And we laughed and laughed and laughed...because that would be amazing.

The end.


Thursday, August 04, 2016

My Neighbor, Bob

So, I'm a little choked up tonight because I had a knock at my door at 8:30, and standing there was my neighbor, Bob.  And just like every summer, he has a plastic baggy of various vegetables that he brings to me.  Usually, it is jam packed with tomatoes and zucchini…I wasn't disappointed tonight.

Bob has had a "For Sale" sign outside his house for about 20 days, and today there was a "pending" sign added to it.  When Bob dropped off my vegetables, I had to ask what the deal was and why he was going and when.  He has grandchildren, ages 2 and 4, and one more on the way out and he simply can't stand being away from his family, so he and his wife are going to move to Phoenix, "Of all places." he said.

It was in that moment that my asshole dog came down the stairs and barked her vicious bark and I pushed her away with my toe and he ignored the 8 pound shitty purse-dog like he always has…and this made me sad.  Twig has always barked at men and Bob just got used to it and would either talk to her in the back yard or ignore the noise until she realized he wasn't a threat.  Bob would see me busting my ass in the back yard digging up weeds, mowing what living grass I had left, cleaning the patio, whatever I was doing and hang over the fence and remind me, "You're like a real home owner.  Doing a good job."  And I know he was being nice because those who've graced the presence of my home know the yard is a shit-show and should be burned.
My neighbor Bob, has been kind to me since the day I moved here with Farrah and in his own right, kept a look out for us.  I never truly had the pleasure of meeting his wife except for a note that was left taped on my door one night about my dog that had been left out all night and barked non-stop and kept her up (only it wasn't my dog, because Twig was inside with me)…so that small interaction was, meh. But Bob was and is a very good man and I had no idea how much I'm going to miss him until I put my vegetables in the refrigerator.

Who will these new people be?  Are they going to cheer me on about my awful yard or are they going to write letters to the Home Owners Association?  Are they going to have kids Farrah's age that can play with her, or will they have teenagers who have parties when their parents are gone?  I have no idea what to expect except that I know I am really going to miss him.  Whenever I'd talk about him to James or to friends or other neighbors, I'd refer to him as "Old-Man-Bob".  Because he is…he's old.  But I love having old neighbors and he has turned out to be one of the absolute best.

I suppose Phyllis across the street should prepare herself for some unexpected visits from me from time to time, now.  She's a little older, so she'll do.