Gross Inspections

You know you've entered into the true role of motherhood when you find yourself picking the nose of your child or lifting her high over your head to smell her butt to see if she crapped herself. Things I'd see other moms do and cringe when I'd see it. Who wants to touch another human beings boogers and smell another person's poop? ME! THAT's WHO!!! That's all I felt like saying.

Decompress

Mike and I have a second home in East Wenatchee. It is our "Decompression House." It is where we go to do nothing at all, but forget about all the bullshit that awaits for our return back on the west side of the mountains. We have our big screen TV there, but no cable. There is no internet access and no phone lines. It sounds like it would be completely boring...until you look out at our back yard. We have the most amazing view of the city. The back yard goes on forever and ever. I am inviting my friends and family to go there when they would like. You just need to make sure it's not a weekend that we plan on going there. There are board games there, and the TV has a stereo and DVD player hooked up to it. All you have to do is bring your movies and music and you're all set. We invite people to enjoy a little piece and quiet away from everything. It feels like you're in a cabin, only you're in a quaint neighborhood. The weather is always beautiful and there is always a nice breeze. We hope to install a pool, but we're not sure when that will happen. There are still priorities that take precidence back in Arlington.

We went to Wenatchee this last weekend. I loved it. Sometimes we'd watch a movie and other times we'd sit there reading. A lot of times, we simply slept and caught up on some much needed rest. It was Farrah's first time at the house. We left the play pen for future visits so we don't have to cart it around with us everytime. Being there allowed for us to spend more one on one time with her. When we're at home on the weekends, it's so easy to get caught up in having to do chores and run errands that you forget to take time for family. That's what this weekend was for. Family time, and we all loved it. We also brought Titan with us. We don't usually allow people to bring their pets due to the risk of other pets peeing on the carpet which has happened. We didn't want to leave Titan at home so we packed him in his crate for the 2 and a half hour drive through pouring down rain. It was a white knuckle drive until we reached Leavenworth. After that it wasn't too bad. When we arrived, Titan barely had a mist on him. We walked him around the property and the next day took him off leash in the back field. He was in Doggie Heaven. The tough thing for him was his nerves. He was so nervous, he chose not to eat. Since he didn't eat, he didn't poop. He held it until we pulled in to our house in Arlington to relieve the pressure. It was so great over there and we all enjoyed ourselves. Can't wait to go back!

Progress

As many, or all of you know, Mike's uncle, Bill, had a massive stroke back in January. He has been staying at a rehab facility in Everett for about a month and a half now and is getting ready to be transferred to stay in Arizona with his daughter. We are really hoping the change of scenary will do him good, as well as a nice climate change. Farrah and I have been visiting him at least once a week to check on his progress and to simply say hi. He loves seeing her. It really seems to brighten up his day. Every time I go there, it seems like there's a change for the better. The first time I saw a big change that I thought was great, was when he used the word, "shit." This was very significant, because of Bill's inability to communicate. For a while there, he could only say a handful of words, mainly yes and no. Now, when he tries to tell us something and gets stuck, he simply says, "shit" and that's all we need to hear to understand his frustration. It's a very good release for him. Last week, however, was probably the biggest break through. Farrah and I were sitting next to him and I was bouncing her on my knee and she was smiling very big at Bill. The whole time, Bill would coo at her and make noises. He heard me saying little things to her and suddenly, Bill formed a whole sentence!!! He said, "Look at that face." Can you believe it?!!! I just about fell out of my chair. I flipped out and said, "Holy shit, Bill! Did you just hear what you said?!!!" He shrugged it off and said, "yeah, but." That's all he got out. I asked him if he felt like the words just came out on their own, and he said yes. I reminded him that even if they just slipped out, they were the correct words to use in that moment. It was awesome. Well, lastnight we stopped by to see him again. Someone had helped him to the bathroom, but he managed to take care of business, get himself back in his wheelchair, open the bathroom door, and wheel himself out of his room to the hallway to meet me and Farrah. I was so impressed. We wheeled back to his room and got to his bed. He started to unfold his bed sheet and I asked if he wanted me to go ahead and do it. Yes. I thought maybe he wanted to use the sheet to go over him when he got into bed. He said, "No, make..." MAKE! New word! He pointed to the bed and said, "make." He asked me to make the bed. Done! Then there was the heavy blanket. It was very hot in the room so I assumed that he would want the blanket at the foot of his bed. I asked him and he said, "No, put..." and pointed up and down the bed. "Do you want me to lay the blanet out so it can cover you?" "Yes." YAY!!! We were fully communicating. To some, this may seem so trivial, but it was extremely exciting. With as little communicating as we can get out of him, it's so great when we can get something. I asked if he remembered saying, "Look at that face" and he did. He didn't shrug it off this time. He's noticing his own progress which is so important. I think it helps give him some hope that there will be some independence and communication at the end off this rough road. We can't wait to get Bill back. And I'm pretty confident that we will.

Dear Farrah Part 3

Holy cow, you're 3 months old today!!! You have your second cold and this one is not as friendly as the last one. You're so congested. When you breath, you sound like a pig. I've been using the little suction bulb on you, and at first you don't mind, but then as I start getting a rhythm going, you start to cry. This, of course, makes me feel like crap because I made you cry. However, I guess you got even with me by passing your virus onto me. Thanks for that. I've been propping you up to allow the mucus to flow out of your face rather than out your ass. Yeah, about that...you pooped snot. Twice. I thought for sure there was something terribly wrong with what I was seeing in your diaper, so I called the doctor. He said it was a common thing since babies don't know to blow their noses, they just swallow the snot. It's kinda gross, but makes perfectly good sense. You've been sleeping A LOT due to not feeling well. And that makes me feel bad for you. However, like the last time you were under the weather, you still give your dad and I that bright smile that says "everything's okay even when I feel like crap."

One of the neat things about you being 3 months old are the fun clothes I get to start putting you in. I haven't been able to put you in some of your "outfits" until recently. You are just now fitting in the 0-3 months clothes. You're so tiny that you still fit in your newborn clothes. Not for too much longer, though. This month you've worn two dresses and three pairs of pants. That's quite the change from your usual onesies and pajamas. We did have one weird moment when we put you in a dress and took you out to a restaurant with us. I figured we were finally going to go out for a nice dinner and figured I'd put you in a pretty red dress your Grandma Jan bought you. In my mind, I assumed this would also help people decipher whether you were a boy or a girl. The first person who looked in your carrier asked us, "How old is he? How big was he when he was born?" Your father responded with, "Well, HE is a SHE" and he continued to answer her questions from there. This was weird to us, because everything about you screams, GIRL.



Yesterday, I went through your room and started to "nest" again. I have hated how I organized things when you were on your way here. Since I had figured how I liked things to be, I had to rearrange your clothes. In doing so, I came across a whole bunch of clothes you can no longer wear. Those items would be any and all of your preemie clothes. Not only that, but the hats and clothes the hospital provided. Since your dad and I are sentimental idiots and don't feel comfortable throwing anything away that has anything connected to you, we will be saving those items. That means, when you read this when you're older, you will know exactly what I'm writing about because you will actually get to see them.

Every week your talking skills get stronger and stronger. Also, you've started to learn how to scream. It's actually a cross between a scream and a squeal. It usually starts before a cry and sometimes before you begin whining and then talking. You move your tongue around and try to tell me about your day. Not only does your mouth move, but you have several facial expressions to accompany your story and make it more complete and believable. You are able to lift your left eye brow while leaving the right one in a relaxed position. This is something that I can do and your father can do. This is your "I'm planning something evil and I'll be sure to leave it for you in my diaper" look.



Your new best friends are Left Hand and Right Hand. They constantly take up residence in your mouth. It seems that you've started to learn that they actually serve a purpose. When I give you your pacifier, your hands quickly head straight for the mouth and assist in keeping it in place. You have just recently started doing the same with your bottle. You aren't strong enough to hold it in place, but you seem to be quite aware that you can certainly help balance it.

You have discovered TV. Don't worry, it will not become your babysitter. You seem to really enjoy baby Einstein. And then there's your smile. I can't help but talk about it all the time. Your smile is SO BIG. I LOVE IT!!! The way you smile is almost too much for me. When you first see me or your dad, you smile really big, turn your head to the side, and almost in a bashful manner, pull your hands up to your face and hide. After that it's just constant ear to ear grinning. You already have some amazing smile lines around your eyes. That's a good sign. Smile lines are much more flattering that frown lines. However, you do frown sometimes, too. It's almost an expression of deep thought. Could be pooping, though. Well, you're starting to make a creaking door sound which means I need to head over and prevent the inevitable screaming. I can hardly believe you are already a quarter of a year old. Crazy.

I love you, Face.

Mama

It's sad...

Well, it has come time for me to make a very difficult decision. It's something that I hope I can get a little help with, too. I need to find a better home for Titan. He is not getting the attention he needs and deserves. I have become too overwhelmed with my new baby that my old baby has taken a back seat. While working full time, taking care of a newborn, and hitting the gym, my dog doesn't get to go for walks, go for drives, and the back yard suffers in not getting cleaned up. It's basically like taking care of two kids and it is very hard. I know there are several people out there that have probably managed to make it work, but I don't have things set up for him to be able to play like I know he'd like to. For this, I feel like shit because I absolutely love that dog, but I love him enough to know that he's not happy and he deserves to be because he's such a great dog. I'm hoping that those that read this might know someone who would like to have a good family dog. He's a very good dog. He went through puppy classes and knows the basic commands (sit, stay, down, come or wait). He's been socialized with other dogs and the groomers love him because he's one of the easiest large dogs to bathe because he's so cooperative. Titan needs a home with a yard large enough to run around in (fenced), a loving family, someone to walk him, and just give him their heart. He is not an aggressive dog so if someone is looking for a bad ass killer, Titan is not it. If any of you out there can help me with this, I'd really appreciate it. Please remember that this is a very difficult thing for me and I already feel like shit about it. It has made me feel a little like a failure as a dog owner and mommy of Titan. This is a decision that I've been fighting for quite sometime and saw coming when I was 7 months pregnant. Please help if you can.

Thank you.

Photo Nazi

Last month, Farrah had her newborn baby pictures taken. She is very photogenic and quite the little model. It was a fun experience and I was lucky enough to have used a photographer that had a digital camera so I could get a sneak peek at what the pictures would look like. Well, for the past couple weeks, the person who sells the pictures has been trying to schedule a time to meet up with me to place my order. We finally touched base last night and scheduled a meeting today from 12:30 to 1:30 with the hopes that maybe Mike could attend.

I rushed out of work and made it home at exactly12:30 with my daughter. It was her lunch time as well as mine, so I fed her while I waited. I waited, and then waited some more. I called her twice and she didn't answer her phone. At 1:00, she finally arrived. I was a little irritated, needless to say, since I don't like to go over my lunch break time too much and I was now left with 30 minutes. I knew I would just have to arrive later at work to realistically do this.

The lady went over the deals with me and shared how great their pictures were. And they were, but the prices weren't. I felt I was buying photos with little pieces of gold inserted into the paper. The package that had the works which included a framed 10 x 25 photo (or something like that), a 20 x somthing, all the photos in 5 x 7, all the photos in wallet size, a CD, and some other stuff. That was $800!!! WTF?! She went down the list and everything she said went in one ear and out the other. I just stopped listening. Like hell if I was going to spend that kind of money. The cheapest package: 3 - 5 x 7s and 1- 8 x 10 and that was $175. When she was finished, I told her that there was no way that I was pulling out my checkbook to pay for any of this. I needed to speak to my husband about it and see what we could do. They didn't offer anything where you could simply order the individual items you wanted; you had to purchase a package. She kept saying I thought your husband was going to be here. You said he would be here. In fact, I never did say that at all. I told her he would try to be here.

She didn't have any brochures and told me that she wasn't able to come out again and this would be the only time we could purchase. I was pissed off. I told her I thought the prices were outragious and I didn't think that there were any good deals in what she was offering. She then stated that if I wanted to go have photos done at Walmart to get a better deal, that was always an option but I wouldn't get near the quality. I said I'm not looking at buying crap either, I simply felt she needed to have it set up differently so people didn't feel like they had to buy on the spot. Had I known that was how it was going to be, I would have gone a different direction for our pictures. She then told me I probably should've asked her how the sales pitch would go when I was on the phone with her in the first place. Our friendly, yet not friendly bantering went back and forth for a good ten minutes while she packed her stuff to leave.

Finally, she took a deep breath and made me an offer that made a whole lot more sense than the BS she was trying to sell. She basically tied in one of the middle packages that are usually $500 and sold it to me at the $200 price. I'm not stupid. I know her packing her stuff to leave was part of her act to get me to break and ultimately have her finally give me the true offer. I believe they set it up to see if there are idiots there that would pay these horrible prices thinking this is the best they can get and that they're stuck losing their newborn's pictures if they don't. That's what pissed me off. I was ready to open the door and send her on her way without any pictures of Farrah, but it would've killed me. It's not like I could go back a month and get those shots again. She was already bigger than she was then.

The company was called "Growing Family". Do NOT buy from them. They are in the business of extortion. They hire people who don't have children to basically hold the photos of your babies hostage for an outragious ransom. If the sales people did have children of their own, they would be considered the devil. Shame on that company for putting several families through hell to get the pictures of their kids. They know we love our children like crazy so it makes us weak when it comes to spending money. Most of us have just written big checks for hospital bills, formula, diapers, and doctor appointments. Bastards.

Stuff

I haven't written in quite a while. I suppose there hasn't been a whole lot going on lately that I felt compelled to share with everyone. It seems that every time I write something, it's usually about Farrah, but I can't help it. She's still new and the "newness" hasn't quite worn off yet. Anyone who knows me, knows when I have someone special in my life that I am completely obsessed about, I usually talk about them all...the...time. For example, Mike. People at my work probably think I consider him my Lord because of how often I talk about him. Every person at every place I've ever worked at for the past 10 years, knows all there is to know about Mike Moody. I guess it's a pride thing. I'm proud of my relationship with my husband. He's my best friend and we have an awesome bond. Our relationship is unique and special. The other reason that I share about my husband and daughter so much is to make me feel less away from them. If I talk about them often, then I don't feel like I only get to see them for a small percentage of the day. It helps me miss them less.

Okay, now to talk about some things I've been up to. I've been hitting the gym religiously for the past few weeks and working my ass off. I've been altering my eating habits a bit to make sure that I keep a healthier life style and give Farrah more nutrients and my butt less fat. Mike plans to train me next month and part of me is excited about it while the rest of me is nervous. I really don't want to be pushed to the point of almost puking at the gym. It would be pretty embarrassing. I visit Bill and my parents as often as I can. It's very difficult to get out sometimes because it seems like there just isn't enough time in a day. It looks as though Uncle Bill will be transferred to Arizona to live with his daughter who is able to give him the constant care that he needs that, unfortunately, none of us have the ability at this time to do all that needs to be done for him. We will miss him while he's gone but we intend to make trips out there to see him. The goal is to get him back home to live on his own. Hopefully, that can be achieved in the next 6 months. I'm looking forward to daylight savings time so I can get out more. It just seems harder to do much of anything when it's dark. Well, anyway, this has been a pretty boring entry so I think I'll end it now while I'm ahead.