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Friday, October 13, 2006

Take a Picture...It'll Last Longer

I had a real estate agent meet with me today in my office to go over an offer my clients made on his clients' house. As soon as he walked through the door, it was as if his eyes were a magnet and my boobs were a refrigerator. His eyes met with mine though half of the conversation while the rest of the time he was watching my cleavage. I of course caught onto this right away and covered my arms over my chest which just seemed to pull the cleavage up more. Oh shit! He's back. Okay, he left. This time when I saw him coming I took my long locks and brought them forward to hide my feeders. I think what made this whole experience icky, was that he's an old man. White hair with white long nose hairs. I felt like grabbing some tweezers and plucking some of those out of his face because they were making my nose itch and caused me to have some difficulty breathing. It was as if he had a polar bear stuck up his nose. It was so fluffy. I guess while his eyes were fixated on my boobs, mine were fixated on his nostrils. I couldn't believe he could pull in any oxygen through there and I'm sure he thought it was amazing I could even stand up straight with my balloons.

Oh yeah, I was flirted with the other night at the local Safeway. I was standing in line with a case of Coke for Mike and some bread and soup. This young man behind me was standing awfully close and finally asked me with his lower grill covered in what I can only imagine to be pure gold, if I needed help out to my car. He also asked if he could carry anything for me. Let me remind you, I had 1 case of Coke, a loaf of bread, and a can of soup. I'm going to take that as flirting, wouldn't you? It's been a while so I'll take what I can get and enjoy it. In the end, I did decline his offer as I am not handicapped.

1 comment:

Mike Moody said...

I got flirted with at that same Safeway. I guess it was probably more than just flirting. This 19 year old super hot chick with near perfect proportions; finger-banged my butt while she gave me the blow job of my life.

And all I did was ask her what time it was... Go figure.