Turd

I was warned that it could happen. I have been told horror stories time and time again. I don't think they truly prepared me for the event that I was presented with today. Lately, I have been getting up early to get ready for the day and if I'm lucky, Farrah is still asleep when I put that final coat of mascara on. However, there are the days when she is awake with me and decides to hang out in the bathroom with me. So, to help keep her occupied while I put on my make up and do my hair, I let her have some fun in the bath tub. Well, today I was doing my thing and noticed her just standing there. My rule is that she needs to be sitting in the tub. I told her twice to sit and she wouldn't do it and she just stared at me and smiled. So, I picked her up and made her sit in her bubble bath. When I did this, she started to whine. She picked up one of her toys in the bath water to show to me. At least I thought it was a toy. The water was so bubbly I didn't notice what it was until it surfaced. I squealed, "PUT THAT DOWN!!!" which made her start to cry. Now I knew why she was so upset. When I made her sit down in the tub, I was actually making her sit down in what she was trying to avoid in the first place. Her shit. My daughter crapped in the bath. My daughter does not like to be dirty. And unfortunately, my daughter doesn't give many warning signs when she's gotta go. She picked up a giant "Farrah turd" to show me as her way of saying, "Look Mom, the reason I was standing up and ignoring your requests is because you decided to remove my diaper and place me in here approximately 5 minutes too soon. So, here is what happens when I don't have a way to communicate with you that I was prairie dogging. Poop is what happens." I placed her on her towel while I drained the crappy tub. However, while I was trying to take care of that, she wasn't quite done. She's so freakin' quiet!!! I cleaned her up...again. I scoured the tub and started a new bath. She was so tired of bath time by the time she was a clean, she whined and whined until I put her down for her nap. It must have been horribly exhausting for her; pooping and all.